Men's no boundaries shorts
Significant Other drama and rants
2015.07.22 00:10 apotero Significant Other drama and rants
A place to post about your SO who is just the *worst*. Come for support, come for advice, or just to vent and get it all out. That's what we're here for.
2023.04.14 16:34 I'm a 2005 Goddess! I'm a human, too! Let me show my body!
Welcome to 2005Goddesses, a safe space for 2005-born girls to celebrate their beauty and power without shame. We prioritize consent, boundaries, and mutual respect, fostering an environment for embracing desires and self-expression. "2005 girls" are rapidly gaining attention, making it crucial to ensure their transition into NSFW content is safe and mindful. Our mission is to create an inclusive space to explore desires, celebrating all kinks with consent, boundaries, and respect.
2012.07.14 21:31 kaijunexus Marvel Studios and the Marvel Cinematic Universe
A subreddit dedicated to the Marvel Cinematic Universe!
2023.05.31 02:14 nuclearlady Update : I (46 F) am afraid I don’t have enough time with my father (80 M) and don’t know what to do
( please search me for the previous post , I don’t know how to link the previous post thank you ) My father became very sick in Ramadan and couldn’t fast for about a week ( he never stopped fasting no matter what he is going thru ) I spoke to him on the phone and he was coughing severely and barely breathing!! I was so alarmed !! I have 5 adult siblings that live at home with him / 4 married and living outside the house and they seem to not exerting any effort to take care of him. He went to E/R twice and still not a lot of improvement. I was barely sleeping thinking about him, praying that he becomes better and practicing other spiritual activities for him. I know I sound silly but I couldn’t do anything more because of my narc mom. I was checking on him every day multiple times. He became better ( surprisingly ) and his cough subsided and almost breathed normally again. May be it’s the emotional support and love that made him better. Any way fast forward to Eid, he collapsed again. This time I told him I WILL attend with him his appointments with the hematology clinic. I can’t describe to you the moment we saw each other at the hospital ! Imagine an 80 year old man crying like a baby !! He lost it in front of people!! He said I feel better already that I met you my daughter!! I cried a bit and then we both got a hold on ourselves and went to the appointment. The physician was a very sweet lady that was considerate and helpful. My father proudly told het that I am a nuclear medicine technical specialist. I told her that dad was having this cough that wont go, she told me she will speak to her colleague- a thoracic consultant- and we can see him immediately!! Long story short I spent 4-5 hours with him performing all the tests and was diagnosed with lung infection. He was put on antibiotics and cough syrup and inhalers. He became better. Since then I am attending with him all his appointments ( it had been around two months) I am taking care of him as much as possible ( remotely) after we finish each appointment, we go to sit together in a coffee inside the hospital. He confessed to me that my mother is treating him poorly and have turned all my siblings against him also and they also are uneasy with him. An 80 yr old man, sick , fragile , hearing impaired and walks with a cane drives himself to his appointments and attends his appointments alone. I forgave my father for previously siding with my mother - after all she is a narc and very manipulative and is a master in brainwashing - she is so evil, she used him, convinced him to write her half of the around 3 million dollars house and most probably took advantage of his illness to transfer the rest of his money to her bank account. She is trying to get rid of him !! He literally told me she want him dead ! My father is sane and will never make up stories like this about her. I forgot to mention that after few meetings he asked me if I want to go back to work and told him that I am still not stable health wise so he insisted on me to give him my bank account and wired me around 26k dollars. I think that is what is left in his bank account. He have a retirement stipend every month. So he is basically living on that stipend alone ( and provides for the people living with him at home aka mom and siblings ) I’m scared now that she might cause his health to deteriorate ( switching pills or something ) he told me that once he told the house help to not put salt in lunch because of his cardiac condition and he heard mother later telling her to put MORE salt !! She is trying to make him sick and trying to drive him crazy !! No wonder he is so depressed. I thought of inviting him to live with me but I know that my evil narc mom will use it to her advantage and may create a seen in front of the neighbors and apparently everyone as she has done it before with her sister in law in front of her VIP guests ( reputation is everything where we live ) and of course we don’t want this drama. In terms of meeting my dad and attending his appointments with him to help and take care of him, it’s exhausting but rewarding relationship wise. We are both happy that things are much better between us. But I am worried about him. I wake up sometimes at night thinking of different scenarios of what will happen in the near future to him. Today he told me he became sick suddenly during driving and that he had to stop driving and park for a while until he is a bit better before resuming driving home. It’s terrifying. I don’t know what to do. I don’t think there is anything that can be dine tbh. Any advice or love is very much appreciated. Thank you for reading.
TLDR: my narc mom turned everyone against me including my dad for several years and recently she turned everyone against my dad after he became sick and old. Other important details in the post.
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2023.05.31 02:13 BargerianJade Mill street bistro . . . Oh no
So I lived in Norwalk Ohio from 2012-2015, literally walking distance from Mill Street Bistro. Not a single person I worked with or hung out with knew about that place. It was in such a ridiculously hidden spot, it was stupid.
However, here's the funniest thing to me. When Gordon asked for a place he could go get lunch, they sent him to Berries.
I worked there for 48 hours before quiting.
- FILTHY. Like worse than any restaurant I've seen on the show
- Their pos was like 100 years old and ran on the staff remembering things like "oh twice baked potatoes means sweet potato fries, Green bean casserole means ceaser salad"
- Weird serving rules. As a waitress you could not bring the food out in trips (nor could you set it down,) you have a table of 12 people, you're using the tray big enough to bring out food for 12 people.
- Weird gender rules. Had to serve all women first. AND could never bend over to serve the food, had to "bunny dip" the way playboy bunnys serve cocktails, so that no one would think we were trying to flirt with the men at our table.
Was very young at the time and was immediately told "oh, hey the other waitresses are going to hate you because you're young and beautiful, just giving you a heads up" by the manager.
Watched many servers build salads with bare hands right after smoking.
Was told I was "stuck up" because I didn't want to eat off of customer's leftover plates
So like Mill Street was bad but Berries would not have survived had it not been for their location
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2023.05.31 02:13 bay_blades having to deal with an unaccepting father
a few weeks ago my mother came down to visit. the visit was so good i posted about it. my mom is so accepting and even to this day she'll ask about my girlfriends.
now my father is a different story. my mom and my dad divorced when i was 13 for reasons that'll become obvious (plus he cheated on her). i didn't have a good relationship with him throughout my teenage hood but im trying to rebuild the bond with him because my mom tells me he's changed a lot
because of how good the meeting with my mom went i tried to open up a bit to my father. i (luckily) started with light conversation by asking how he feels about the idea of me dating women and he went OFF.
he told me that if i came out he'd kill me and whomever i was talking to, he went on a rant about how it's disgusting and he didn't raise me that way. when he asked me if i liked women i told him no and luckily he believed me because (as far as he knows) ive only been in relationships with men. if he isn't accepting that i may like women then he'll definitely not be if he found out that im in a poly relationship.
i asked my mom not to talk to dad about me because i have to get ready to just cut him out of my life completely. she agreed and apologised for misleading me on how much he's actually changed.
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2023.05.31 02:13 AutoNewsAdmin [Sports] - US U-20 Men's National Team rolls into FIFA U-20 World Cup quarterfinal with no goals allowed
2023.05.31 02:12 tarvolon Coming-of-age in an Unfamiliar World (and Bingo Heroics?): An ARC Review of The Last Dragoners of Bowbazar by Indra Das
This review is based on an eARC (Advance Reading Copy) provided by the publisher via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review and can also be found on my blog. The Last Dragoners of Bowbazar will be released on June 1, 2023.
I’ve been hearing about Indra Das for a while, but not enough to push him to the top of a crowded TBR. But when a new release novella (not from Tordotcom!) started getting acclaim from bloggers I follow, I figured The Last Dragoners of Bowbazar would be the perfect opportunity to give his writing a try.
The Last Dragoners of Bowbazar follows the son of dragon-riding nomads from another world, growing up in Calcutta with little knowledge of his family’s homeland. There are hints and fragmented memories, but not enough for him to be confident in their reality, let alone make rejoinder to the boys at school who mock him for being “the snake from nowhere.” He has no grand quest, simply a desire to understand his heritage and build relationships with friends and family, despite being hampered on both sides by his awkward position between two worlds.
When I see a secret world of dragon-riders in the blurb, I expect a fantasy adventure. This is not that. Instead, it’s a touching coming-of-age novella in a setting suffused with magic, but where the magic is decidedly not the point. There are oblique references to war, danger, dragon-riding empires and interdimensional travel, but it’s all backstory. The point is the lead struggling to live as a second-generation immigrant, disconnected both from the world of his family and the world he lives in.
It’s a short novella, and the length is appropriate for the small-scale of the story, which moves through the lead’s adolescence and into adulthood without a driving plot, dwelling here on memories of his family’s magic and a house full of relics, there on a fumbling romance with another neighborhood immigrant and the clash between gender expectations in his ancestral land and his current one. There is certainly character growth, and too satisfying of an ending for me to call this a “no plot, just vibes” tale. But the vibes are undoubtedly a big part of the draw. The prose is excellent, and mostly invites the reader to sit with the lead in his discomfort and uncertainty.
But for all the discomfort, it’s not a story without hope. As the lead grows up, he learns more about his family and their reasons for secrecy, and a strong friendship outside his household both succors and sharpens him. It’s not that it erases the sense of dislocation so much as allows him to understand it and choose how to respond—a more grounded story than the magical setting suggests. His family's flight across dimensions may be unique, but the challenges he faces are more those of the second-generation immigrant than the dragon-riding fantasy hero.
On the whole, The Last Dragoners of Bowbazar is slow-paced but beautifully written, eschewing an adventure plot for an intense character focus. Those who enjoy coming-of-age stories and characters trying to reconcile the differences between the world of their family and the world of their peers are in for a treat. Recommended if you like:
magical realism, coming-of-age, immigrant stories. Can I use it for Bingo?
Shoot, this may be my MVP through the first two months of Bingo. It’s hard mode for Novella, Indie Published, Literary SFF/Magical Realism, Title With a Title, and Multiverses, and it’s also a 2023 Release by a POC Author featuring Mythic Beasts. Overall rating:
17 of Tar Vol’s 20. Five stars on Goodreads.
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2023.05.31 02:12 JAGeighteen I’m From a Future Where Aliens Farm Humans for Meat [Part 1]
I’m writing this in the present year, but this isn’t my time. I’m from a dark and terrible future, but I’ve been given the chance to write this warning to you. I’m hoping it will help you save survive what’s coming. First a little about me, I’m from the south born and raised. Due to some complicated family drama I ended up the twenty-four year old guardian of my younger sister Teri who was fourteen in 2033, right before…well I’ll get to that soon enough. But either way, the two of us lived in a small house on the outskirts of a tiny town off the beaten path. I worked hard back then to take care of my sister while she focused on her school. It was an OK life if rough at times. We couldn’t have known what was coming no one could. They were coming.
I know it sounds unbelievable, but it happened or will happen I should say. Aliens invaded every corner of the planet and world war three began overnight. Of course, it didn’t go well for us humans. In the space of about a month, the narrative of, “We’ll send these aliens back from where they came from,” collapsed and humanity ended up in a losing running battle as the aliens’ robot armies overran city after city, country after country. One morning, a couple of weeks into it my sister and I were eating at the kitchen table. The schools had been closed even though the battles were going down on the other side of the state. We both saw the news on our screens, but I tried telling my little sister everything was going to be OK, although even back then I didn’t believe it. The planet was divided into free land and occupied zones the latter run by the aliens. No one knew what went on in the zones since no reports or news got out of them, but even then I knew it couldn’t be anything good. I had no idea how right I was, but I would find out.
Our family homestead ended up behind enemy lines. I decided we’d hunker down and see how things went. I don’t know what I thought was going to happen no one was going to save us at least not yet. Unfortunately, as our supplies dwindled and the fighting got closer I told my sister we needed to make a run for it. We didn’t make it. After being captured by some drone scouts while trekking through the wilderness we ended up in an empty field outside of a burning city in a mob of thousands of people. The aliens divided us humans up into groups and then loaded those groups into trucks. A drone pulled my sister away from me. I started a scene to keep her with me, but all I had to show for it was a mark on my cheek.
Next I ended up in the back of a windowless truck. Light peeked in through the canvas at the back allowing us ragged prisoners to look at each other, but no one dared speak a word. The brakes squealed, some people fell out of their seats from the force. The tension in the back thickened until the gray canvas parted revealing the front of an elongated beige alien head its beady red eyes examining us. He swept aside the canvas cover and several drones were around him. The alien spoke in a series of harsh snarls and growls, which I later found out amounted to their language. The wild swings and gestures with his long skeletal arms gave us the message to get out as soon as possible. This alien was freakishly tall at least nine feet about average for their species. He had beige colored skin and a freakishly long head with sunken red eyes and big teeth jutting out of its mouth. I hopped out and joined the group forming in the grass on the side of the road. Another guy hesitated at the sight of the drop. The alien grabbed his arm and yanked him off. The man landed with a thud and then floundered in the dirt as the thing screeched at him. The drones hovered around my group. One of them said to us in a deep voice, “The meat will finish the journey on foot.”
The skies above were gray as we trudged towards our destination off in the distance. Chain link fences hanging on wooden poles surrounding drab metal buildings. This was one of dozens of the aliens’ camps spread across the planet. We passed another truck in front of the one we got here in. Smoke bellowed out from under the hood as robots climbed all over it. Closer to the gate some commotion erupted. One guy made a break for it. There was a huge field to the right and at the end of it a forest. There was no way he was going to make it on foot. “Halt meat! Halt!” a drone said holding up a metal hand. Our group waited to see if the man would get his freedom. One of the aliens screeched and stepped away from the caravan. The man raced across the wide field. The alien raised its weapon. One of his friends colored a pale shade of white got behind him and watched from over his shoulder. The runner closed in on the tree line. The gun fired. He dropped in the mud a few feet from his destination. The alien lifted its gun in triumph. His pale friend put a hand on his shoulder and opened his mouth into what I guess was a smile. We got moving again. I passed through the gates into the yard as eyes from the watch towers bore down on me and my fellow prisoners. There was no tour we went straight into the building in front of us. The smell hit me first, blood and other fluids hung in the air as a permanent musk that burned my nose and eyes. The screams of humans and the thumping of heavy machinery in the distant parts of the building mixed together and assaulted my ears. I didn’t see anything that day. The drones herded us into an enclosed area completely walled off and lit with the same low red lighting as the rest of the place. In the middle of room were pens made of sharp wire reaching up towards the ceiling. Ten or so of us squeezed into one pen and the doors closed behind us and were tied off with heavy chains. For weeks, although it felt like months (it was hard to keep track) most of my time was spent there. My days consisted of waking up surrounded by ten random people, being escorted through the maze of hallways to the feeding area, and ending up back where we started. Sometimes the same pen sometimes a different one and usually with a new group of faces. The aliens feed as blue slop, which tasted bad and I would later learn had a very undesirable ingredient.
For a month this was my life until the big night.
I sat on the cold floor with a sea of legs around me (it was my turn to sit) and then the heavy doors at the front of the room creaked slowly. The aliens didn’t bother us at night one of our few comforts so thoughts of fear and worry erupted in my mind. Clamoring traveled my way from the pens closer to the door. I pushed my way to the wires so I could face the hallway. Figures in the dark moved around the cages. A bearded man in fatigues holding a rifle approached, “Keep it down, we’re here to bust you out,” he said in a harsh whisper. Another man came over with huge bolt cutters. The chain clasped around the door fell with a metallic thud. I went with the flow as we all spilled out into the area around the cages. Our rescuers were part of a resistance group and one of them ordered us to stay put. No one argued. Some of the resistance members went to work on the other locks while others remained in the growing crowd of escapees. Among these armed saviors I spotted a familiar face one I never thought I’d see again. “Kyle!” I said wading through the crowd toward the tall muscular man armed to the teeth. He wore the same discount vigilante outfit like when I first met him the longest month before. I should have mentioned this earlier, but about a month before the aliens arrived, this guy Lew Kyle saved me and my sister from being mugged in a parking lot. He said he was an intergalactic vigilante or something. I thought he was crazy. Back then, I didn’t think aliens existed. Boy was I wrong. In my defense Kyle passed as human if an extremely athletic one. He glared at me with squinted eyes, but then they widened with recognition, “Oh hey dork, good to see you. I thought you’d be dead by now.” "Wait, why would I be dead?” I said. “Well you know, between the global war, Mad Max savages, and being put on the alien’s menu, it was a distinct possibility.”
“There are Mad Max savages?” “Not anymore,” he said tapping his massive gun. “I thought you said you were leaving the planet?” “I was until the aliens made getting off a bit of a mess so I fell in with these guys. They’re not the best soldiers, but don’t worry stick close to me and I’ll get you out alive.” He shoved me aside and fired into the rafters. Bullets clanged as they ricocheted off metal. A second later the limp mechanical body of a drone hung over the railing of a catwalk above us. Several of my fellow prisoners got off the ground removing their hands from their ears, while other remained crouched. A resistance member glared at the man holding the machine gun. “Think they heard that?” Kyle said. Alarms blared and the lights came on. “Well,” Kyle said while pulling something out of his vest, “Since our covers’ blown might us well do this.” “What’s that?” I asked. “You’ll see, but first let’s get out of here.”
The group of soldiers led us out of the holding room and into the hall. I stuck close to the mighty Kyle confident he’d keep his word. Halfway on our trip the walls shook as a huge explosion roared in the distance in the direction of the front gate. “What was that?” I said resuming my pace. Kyle smiled, “Nothing, I just rammed a truck loaded with explosives through the front door.” The group turned down a hall I hadn’t visited before. There were two doors at the end. “Get ready to run,” Kyle said. Resistance members shoved the gates open. Prisoners flowed out the narrow exit and then scattered. I was in the middle of the crowd, but even in the dim moonlight one quick glance let me know we had come out the side exit meaning the vast field the unfortunate runner tried to cross the day I arrived lay between all of us and the fence along the woods. A floodlight light pierced the darkness and lit up a gaggle of ragged people running across the field of dead grass. I traced the searching beam to one of the guard towers. More spotlights lit up the field coming from all sides of us. The dozen or more spotlights lit up the hundreds of human sweeping the field. Some guy tumbled beside me and I saw he had a weird dart sticking out of his back. He contorted on the ground as everyone ran around him. No one had time to help the wounded. My trigger happy friend halted and I followed his lead. He fired in the direction of a building to our left. Aliens, drones, and spotlights congregated on its roof. His gunfire added to the deafening chaos and more resistance fighters joined the chorus of gunfire. Bullets whizzed by, hundreds of voices screamed, alarms wailed, and electro darts flew through the night sky in blue streaks.
“Keep going! I’m right behind you!” He shouted at the top of his lungs his gun going off the whole time. I raced to catch up with the front of the group. I was still a good way from the fence by the woods, but I saw soldiers milled around a hole in the fence through which my fellow captives streamed through. They worked under a spotlight until it vanished probably hit by a bullet. Either way, I had gotten a quick glance of the way to freedom. Though, it wouldn’t be my way. Bullets ripped through the crowd of people to my right. Dirt kicked up, people dropped and either flailed on the ground screaming or else lay still. Resistance soldiers rushed past me. A few seconds later the gunfire intensified and then died. I spared a glanced in their direction. One of the roaming lights passed over a pile of mangled bodies. “Kyle! If we don’t take out that technical we’re blown!” A man said to the vigilante or at least that’s what he told me. I was going the opposite direction when Kyle got his mission. I didn’t get much further though. I felt a sharp pain in my back like someone stabbed me with a giant needle. I tumbled as electricity flowed through my entire body. My muscles wouldn’t obey me so I was left on the ground as legs stomped past me. I couldn’t see well from the angle I landed in, but I could hear just fine. “Hounds! The Hounds!” Someone shouted. I rolled over with a struggle and something drew my attention. I craned my neck and saw the huge figure of Kyle a short distance away. Two soldiers had their arms wrapped around him. They were practically pulling him off the battlefield. “I’ll come back for you! I promise!”
He left my limited field of vision and soon the steady stream of running legs dwindled and then ended. One of the hounds followed them with all eight of its legs thundering along the ground. Its body was coated in silver fur and it was the size of a small elephant. A wave of drones and aliens followed the beast. They surged across the field of trampled grass to continue the pursuit into the woods. I wouldn’t see it any of it; my part in the night’s events was over. Except for one last thing…
One of the aliens halted next to me. He towered over me more than usual and we shared glances. He carried a weird baton in one hand with blue sparks flying off it. The thing jabbed me in the stomach as I lay there helpless. I cried out, but he responded by driving the weapon deeper into my flesh. I stayed there on the ground starring at the grinning face of the alien lit up by the blue light of the prod.
This is getting long. I’ll continue in another post, but for now watch the skies.
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2023.05.31 02:11 Old_Consequence2203 Things I Used To Get Bullied For
I mainly got bullied back in Elementary School. & Here's the things I used to get bullied for:
People making fun of my height: I was always super short growing up...
People CALLED me stupid: I have autism, & people noticed that about me, & knew I had trouble & learned stuff "slower" growing up.
People CALLED me weak: Not only way I super short, but also super skinny! So people saw me as an easy target, to be picked on.
OVERALL, everyone made me feel pathetic: Because of ALL this was happening, I felt so pathetic, because I felt like everyone was better than me at everything. I had a hard time learning because of my autism, & I was a tiny, weak & defenseless kid. I wasn't good at playing PE games, they were fun & I had no trouble, but everyone was always so much bigger & stronger than me. I used to feel so ashamed & depressed by this but I'm over it now. What about you guys? 💔
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2023.05.31 02:11 a_HerculePoirot_fan SPM 2022 Results Megathread
This thread is for all SPM related discussions, may it be results, universities, courses etc. The intention is to help school leavers talk about the SPM in one central spot on the subreddit.
For both public school and private SPM candidates, you can check your results online at myresultspm.moe.gov.my
or retrieve via SMS by sending SPM < space> IC number Examination number (Angka giliran) to 15888. Example: SPM 000527031234 WY189A123
Mental health resources
Pathway after SPM
Links to relevant post-SPM posts
- Universities, degrees and careers - previous questions regarding universities/careers/fields posted by Nyets. The replies may be helpful!
- Information regarding 11 different study pathways after SPM (ex: STPM, Diploma, SKM (Sijil Kemahiran Malaysia, A Levels etc etc. Start from page 8)
- Non-STEM courses such as arts, design, mass comm, business, finance, F&B, hospitality and travel (info about the subjects you will undertake, course duration, career options, etc. Start from page 53)
- STEM courses such as health and sciences, engineering and manufacturing, information technology (info about the subjects you will undertake, course duration, career options, etc. Start from page 56)
For young Nyets who are interested in TVET (Pendidikan Teknikal Dan Latihan Vokasional):
For Nyets who are NEETs/already school dropouts/did not pass their SPM:
- NCER Perak
- NCER Penang
- NCER Kedah
- NCER Perlis
- MyFuture Youth Plus 2023 offers 30 short term skills courses across 22 Institusi Latihan Kemahiran Belia dan Sukan (ILKBS). No registration fee is imposed and deadline is before 16th June. Registration link. Note that some courses were in May. If you're interested, I recommend that you search for the specific IKTBN (Institut Kemahiran Tinggi Belia Negara) on their individual FB page and use their own Google Form like IKBN Kuala Langat or IKTBN Sepang for quicker response.
Free courses to explore new/existing interest:
Volunteering/internship after SPM:
Scholarship info links
- Kechara Soup Kitchen [Link]
- SPCA Selangor Link
- MNS (Persatuan Pencinta Alam Malaysia) [Link]
- WWF Malaysia Link
- MyKasih Link
The moderation team will be removing any SPM-related posts - please share your advice threads, rants, and memes on Malaysians, on the Daily Discussion Thread, or in this post.
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2023.05.31 02:10 RealFirstName_ The girl I’ve(F) been seeing has been saying things about her partner(M) that make it seem like they should breakup. How do I navigate staying out of their relationship.
I’m NEW to all this, like she’s the poly person I’ve dated and I’ve been taking it slow making sure this is what I want and am comfortable with. I’ve learned that seeing/hearing much about her partner is a no-go for me. When I met him I was incredibly uncomfortable with how he treated her, and how much more negative and irritable she got once he showed up. Since then we spoke and I only hear about him a very little amount, but she’s said stuff like “I don’t think I like men that much”, commenting on trying to look more like a lesbian, saying he’s “pretty useless”, and just doesn’t seem happy with him.
On top of that she’s been saying how she hasn’t met someone she likes as much as me in years so I’m kinda feeling a bit like a “home wrecker”.
Do I tell her all this, do I tell her I want to know/hear absolutely nothing about him, is this a massive red flag? Please help a girl out.
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2023.05.31 02:10 KevineCove Is this a normal level of dysfunction?
I've been at my company working as a front-end web developer for about two years now (making $90k and working remotely,) and I've been considering getting a new job, as the level of dysfunction in my company is bothering me. However, I want a reality check to figure out if this is just a case of the grass being greener. Here's how things are going right now:
They have a habit of hiring new college hires in bulk (that's how I was hired) while also not compensating their senior developers properly, leading to mid to senior level developers leaving for better jobs, hampering productivity as there are too many heads without enough guidance to execute things.
A while back, the company laid off several hundred people (I'm not sure how many were developers) who received poor performance reviews. I talked to one of my coworkers who was laid off, and she said that shortly before she was fired, her manager told her she had time to recover from this review. Behavior like this is why members of my team have an appropriate level of distrust toward the management, and we regard their announcements with jaded skepticism.
We have been trying to convert our product from AngularJS to Angular. There was actually an attempt to do this a few years back (before I joined the company) but the effort was scrapped, so we basically waited until the eleventh hour to get it done, and much of our product still runs on (unsupported) AngularJS (we run a hybrid app.)
Our architecture is in shambles. We have one lead developer that knows all of the quirks and bandaids of our product (in one case we check if a user is logged in by throwing an exception, lol,) and one who was able to get approval to create an entirely new copy of our application from the ground up using proper architectural practices. As of a week ago we now run a hybrid app of her new application as well as the old (hybrid) app.
Not related to code architecture, but we've also been instructed not to put markup in our CMS database while also being told that it's already been done too much to try and fix it now.
Our environments are constantly breaking. It feels like most weeks at least one person's environment breaks, and only slightly less often does everyone's environment break all at once. This is usually resolved within a day or two, but sometimes can take longer. This is because even when we run our front and back end locally, we still depend on several remote services.
Our product is spaced out across multiple (interdependent) repositories and teams (and by multiple repositories, I mean literally dozens if not hundreds of which there are probably a dozen that are currently in use); often one team will make a mistake that takes out the environment for several teams, but since we only have access to our own repositories, we can't even help to diagnose and fix other teams' issues when they're resolved.
We have one lead developer that seems to be the only one that knows how to fix these environment problems. Whenever someone else helps me resolve my environment, they almost never know why it works but simply say that our lead developer explained it to them.
Task managers/Scrum leads have no idea what's going on. Often I'll make a change that's as simple as adding a CSS class to an HTML attribute (literally a one line change) but because of poor communication between the team that wanted the styling changed, the task manager, and the developer working on the task, it can easily take 3+ weeks for this change to be merged, during which there may be meetings scheduled where the expected behaviostyling is discussed, or the change may be merged to the wrong branch or repository.
Currently it is kind of comfortable to stay where I am because so little is expected from me (and I can spend much of the day working on personal projects instead) but this job is absolute garbage for my professional development. While I live comfortably, I do have homeownership as an eventual goal and there's no way it's going to happen off of my current income.
submitted by KevineCove
to cscareerquestions [link] [comments]
2023.05.31 02:09 Trentthenewgrad Taller with short parents
Any tall people with really short parents? I’m 6”2 and in my family (relatives included) I’m a giant. My dad is 5”6 and my mom is barely 5”0. My brothers are short as well, and no one in my extended family is above 5”9. So weird, I look like both of my parents so no milkman involved lol. Anybody else relate to this??
submitted by Trentthenewgrad
to tall [link] [comments]
2023.05.31 02:09 reddituser1990 Going to Festivals Sober
I’ve been going to EDC and many other raves/festivals for a few years almost completely sober. At most, Ive had half a beer to 1 beer during these fests. Maybe a mild buzz but thats it. No drugs/party favors whatsoever. Usually I will have coffee, soda, maybe an energy drink, or just iced tea (“space tea” this year) when there, beverage wise. For many of the festivals that I go at NOS, I have a starbucks that I specifically have marked on the map that I stop by and get a coffee from before parking.
I still have great times and make great memories. Like many of you, I also get post-EDC/rave/festival blues (comedown) which lasts about a week or 2 after the event. Many of you have commented that some of the “stuff” you take depletes your serotonin but I think that also happens to those of us that don’t partake as well. I think there’s an environmental change aspect associated to these come downs, but I’m not a psychologist, so I don’t really know.
I’ve always had health anxiety about taking any kind of drugs outside of caffeine, so that’s pretty much what keeps me sober. I’ve also felt that since I always have a great time at these EDM events, then I don’t need to stretch those boundaries and go the extra.
Wondering how many of you like me are out there and what your experience is like? Have you ever almost considered doing the extra? What makes you stay sober?
submitted by reddituser1990
to aves [link] [comments]
2023.05.31 02:07 AutismAccount Please be careful who you trust online
This is related to the current controversy on this sub, but it's not directly a response to it. This isn't talking about anyone here. It's just a general warning. I've seen a few people express doubts that anyone would lie about autism or that people who lie about autism could be doing it for any reason worse than wanting attention. That makes me very worried for them. As someone else commented, some people lie about having autism because of disgusting and cruel sexual reasons, and I wanted people to understand how serious that can be.
(Trigger warning for non-contact child sexual abuse) To make a long story short, when I was a young teenager, I was in an online support forum for people who had experienced trauma. An adult woman around a decade older than me befriended me through forum posts and then private messages. She claimed to have a similar trauma history to me. Once she learned about my autism, she also claimed to be autistic, and she claimed every trait and symptom I have even if they didn't fit anything else she'd told me. She used both her alleged trauma and autism to manipulate me. Any time I noticed red flags in her, she either blamed it on my autism making me read things incorrectly or on her alleged autism making her communicate differently. She also blamed inappropriate sexual things on her alleged sexual abuse history. She spent years sending me sexually inappropriate messages, ignoring or guilt tripping me about any boundaries I set, and implying I was either abusive or socially stupid every time we argued. Eventually, I told my therapist what was happening, and the situation escalated to emails being forwarded to child protective services and the police. The woman had openly posted about having disability, rape, and "age play" kinks, but she claimed her messages to me were because we were friends and because I was "mature enough" for it to be okay. In reality, she was grooming me. She didn't have autism. She didn't have the sexual abuse history she said she did. She was claiming these things to manipulate me and because talking about them with me was part of her kink.
I know people here know in theory that people lie online. Please be careful in practice. It's vulnerable to be a minor online, but it's also vulnerable to have autism and to be a survivor of abuse. Some people can and do take advantage of those things to hurt others, including by lying about their own identity and experiences to get vulnerable people to let their guards down. It's okay to not want to accuse anyone of faking, but please don't trust anyone with sensitive information or ignore behavior that makes you uncomfortable just because they claim to be autistic. I don't want anyone else to go through what I did.
Again, this isn't aimed at anyone here, it's just something to keep in mind in general. It applies to real life situations and people too, but it's even more important online, when someone might not even be the age or gender they claim they are. I still get fooled sometimes, so I run everything by my therapist and partner now so that they can help me identify red flags that people are lying or want to harm me.
submitted by AutismAccount
to SpicyAutism [link] [comments]
2023.05.31 02:06 el47000 Riley Greene taken out of the game with apparent injury (5/30/23)
Bally Sports Detroit showed a replay where Greene appeared to be wincing in pain after making a catch in center field in the top of the third inning against Texas. Greene left the game shortly after that play. The Tigers has given no official word on his status at the time of this post.
UPDATE: Official statement from Tigers: Greene removed with "lower leg discomfort." (Via tigersbowling
submitted by el47000
to motorcitykitties [link] [comments]
2023.05.31 02:06 dutchguy1998 My recent experience with friendship ghosting
I'm not sure why I'm posting this. I've talked with two people about this but I guess I'd like to know if anyone's had a similar experience and how they've handled it. Even just more thoughts of other people might help me. Okay, so this is what happened and what my thoughts are. (Feel free to read and comment/chat/DM me if you feel like it :) )
I met a guy on Bumble (BFF mode) in April and we've only met twice IRL. I felt like we connected really well and this was the start of a beautiful friendship.
However, things very much changed after our 2nd meet-up. We were soon planning a 3d meet-up, for which he was suggesting things we could do. He asked me if I was available on a certain date but then shortly after he replied to his own message saying couldn't meet because he had to work. On that day a few days later I happened to have an appointment very close to his work place and texted him that I just passed by the restaurant he worked at. He replied that he wasn't working bc it was his usual day off, so I obviously got confused and asked him why he told me that he had to work. He explained to me that he had started dating someone and it was all very intense (apparently this started shortly after we met up for a 2nd time (purely friendship-oriented)) and he found it hard to talk about his dating life. I told him that he could share anything he liked to share but also mentioned that it's totally fine for him to keep things private. I wished him the best with his hopefully beautiful love story and didn't ask any question about his dating story. I asked him if he wanted to meet up again or if this was kind of the end of our friendship that had only just started, and he replied that it wasn't necessarily the end and that we'd still grab a coffee some time. He was just very pre-occupied suddenly and didn't want to make plans right away (and I respected that). I did express that I would find it difficult to suddenly go from making a lot of plans together to not being sure when (and maybe even if) we would see each other again and mentioned that losing people/connections is something that I've always been afraid of. Maybe that was TMI/selfish, but the fact that he lied to me and this sudden change made me anxious. We ended this chat on a good note and he said something like "we're just a bunch of introverts who don't know how to deal with all these feelings". He also assured me that this change had nothing to do with me and all with him, and that we had a really good start together, so he knew this was kind of a weird switch that I might take personal. He really wanted to prevent that. I said "alright, talk to you soon" and we wished each other good night.
Unfortunately, we never had a single conversation, either online or IRL, after this chat. I gave him space but did kind of miss him and decided to message him 3 weeks later (just a simple "hey, how's life?). I didn't feel like I was being pushy after messaging him weeks later, also bc he assured me it wouldn't be the end of our friendship. It's now more than 3 weeks later and he still hasn't replied to my message (and hasn't read it). I haven't sent any follow-up message bc I don't know what he's going through and want to give him the space he might need (even tho this ghosting behavior hurts). However, last weekend I noticed he had suddenly unfollowed me on Instagram, and it felt like this happened shortly after I'd posted a holiday pic. When I noticed this I started struggling even more with the ghosting. He didn't remove me from his followers and he also didn't block me on Instagram and WhatsApp. It really hurts bc it feels like an immature way to tell me he's not interested in me anymore. At the same time I have no idea what is actually behind his behavior.
Some of the options I've been thinking about: - He doesn't want to be friends with me for whatever reason but is avoiding any sort of confrontation. - He's going through something difficult and doesn't want to open up about it. - He might have unfollowed me bc it's difficult for him to be confronted in some way with the person he's ghosting. - He's now in a relationship and has no time for (relatively) new friends (basically has other priorities) and for some reason doesn't feel the need to just be honest.
Some of my thoughts on this: - I know ghosting is immature and that this shows he doesn't respect me. In theory I shouldn't want to be friends with someone who lacks basic communication skills, and there is no point in thinking about possible reasons for why this is happening. - I was thinking about sending him an honest message. That I'd respect if he doesn't want to be friends with me, that I'm there for him if he's going through something, but that I'd also respect if he doesn't want to open up to me. I didn't send the message, bc I'm afraid I'd feel worse if he keeps ghosting me. I'm also giving him more attention by doing that while maybe I should just be moving on. - It's rare to have such a good platonic connection with someone after having met them just twice. It really hurts to be left in the dark like this. Rationally, I know that I don't deserve this kind of silent treatment and that I should move on. However, it's still difficult at this point.
Didn't expect to write all of this down, but it really helps. Not really expecting anyone to read this, but thanks to anyone who has lol. Apologies for any typos/mistakes, I haven't done a spelling check.
submitted by dutchguy1998
to ghosting [link] [comments]
2023.05.31 02:06 Beckyk2009 Very small, Pus-filled bump on dogs lip that won’t go away
Signalment- dog, age 6, spayed female, mixed breed - cocker spaniel, Jack Russell, boxer, beagle, 38 pounds • Short history- has always had food allergy issues (affects her anal glands) so she has Royal Canin hp food (however this has gotten better since being on thyroid meds), issues with being a few pounds overweight for last couple of years even though fed normally with no table scraps (losing weight on thyroid meds) , had a mild bout of pancreatitis last summer after getting into bacon grease • Relevant clinical signs- other than usual clinical signs for low thyroid which have improved with meds, has a bump on lip that won’t seem to heal, seems almost like a shallow hole in lip once popping the bump but has been coming back for two weeks now • Length of time you have seen these changes- about 3 weeks • Your general location- western ny
My dog was recently diagnosed hypothyroidism.has been doing amazingly on the meds. Recently discovered a small bump on her left lip that was filled with pus- popped it and it bled a bit and all that was left was a slight hole. Continues to fill back with pus and won’t seem to get better after two weeks which seems unusual for a bump like this. Will check a couple days after I wipe it with a cloth and it will just be a dry, pus filled bump. About the size of a pen point, so relatively small. Curious if i should be worried or just let it go for a month or so.
submitted by Beckyk2009
to AskVet [link] [comments]
2023.05.31 02:05 SuckingCox Is it really this hard?
To find a hot guy with a big dick to suck off regularly? I'm reasonably hot myself, working grindr and reddit pretty hard. I'm married and DL so kinda limited in options. Should I try other apps? Any advice appreciated. No shortage of cocksuckers vs short supply of recipients it seems.
submitted by SuckingCox
to askgaybros [link] [comments]
2023.05.31 02:05 MPD_123 I’m curious If there seems to be any correlation here. I saw one study that indicated larger men generally can last longer. For example I’m short like 5’6” and quite lean about 145lbs. A little skinny even. I feel that this doesn’t help my PE for some reason.
What body composition are you in terms of your overall height to weight ratio? View Poll
submitted by MPD_123
to PrematureEjaculation [link] [comments]
2023.05.31 02:04 Ahoradogol012z Mario Kart no Super Nintendo Corrida Nostálgica #shorts
2023.05.31 02:04 Time-Blacksmith1285 AITA for calling my girlfriend a hypocrite after she wouldn’t help with my car?
I’ve been with my gf 19f for about 3 months now. For the past several months, she’s been helping me keep my room clean as I live with roommates whenever she comes over and I just started a new job which pays once every 2 weeks and so between car payments, rent and insurance, phone bill etc I’ve been falling behind. But thankfully, my gf has been picking up slack and I’m blessed to say that anytime I’ve asked her to help me pay my bills or help with my car note she does it with no questions asked.
Yesterday, she made a post on social media saying she’d gotten attacked by a dog, and that the bite was pretty bad. She also mentioned being in the hospital. However, at the time I was at the pool so I read the post however it completely went over my head to check on her about it, plus she didn’t text or call me about the situation. I proceeded to go live on my Instagram as I was at a pool party and was having a lot of fun.
Today, I texted her telling her that my car had been broken into and I asked if she’d help me pay for the things that were stolen, since I paid for my window repairment. She wouldn’t give me a clear answer and all of her responses and texts were very short. I told her “Don’t just say ok say something” she responded with “I’m busy tonight I don’t know if I can”. I feel crushed and I am highly upset with her. She wouldn’t even elaborate what she meant by “busy tonight”.
I called her and told her I was angry and that she had no right to give me a cold shoulder and told her she was a hypocrite, however she says that she’s busy, that I don’t care about her nor did I check on her, and that I only call when I need something. I disagree and don’t see how this could be the case when I answer whenever she calls to talk about nothing. I hope I haven’t lost her. Aita?
submitted by Time-Blacksmith1285
to AmItheAsshole [link] [comments]
2023.05.31 02:04 TyTransBiatch I HAVE ID HELP RESOURCES FOR U :D !!!
Im just putting this here because I thought a trans girl could help a fellow fren out :).
Ive been going through and trying to find information for changing the gender marker on passports AND driver lisanses the past few days and have curated a very helpful list.
Not only can you get a passport to change your gender pretty easy (they include a box tick on the form to specify if your changing your gender or putting in the one assigned at birth). Generally, ive discovered changing passport is easier. AND, you can get a passport card. Which (excluding driving) you can use as any form of identification anywhere. Even to get into bars, clubs, any form of public interaction needing an ID (Besides driving) you can use it for. Passport cards are awesome because you can mostly use it as your primary ID in the US. You can also travel with it to Cannada and Mexico without a traditional passport. Attached below is the link for that. https://pptform.state.gov/PassportWizardMain.aspx#%7B%22__s%22%3A%22vmlsaS0c2pAf%2FvwE%2Fgy8LZwS%2FfqlfN83Zqysb9xONg2cctjl1dlOhF82YyW6CadcGqwXm%2BmGA0gNl5AfIIjxIyPhMhR53eXOA3dxvHJTC3IvERth%2BkDp5hRy7q8%3D%22%7D
Twards the end of filling out paperwork you can also specify weather you want a ID passport card, a standard passport, or both.
YOU CAN ALSO GET AN X GENDER MARKER ON UR PASSPORT/CARD IF U ARE NON BINARY 😀
Drivers lisance (Tennessee experience)
This was tricky and sucks. I live in Tennessee, Governer bill lee (I call him kill bill) has a law going into effect in july banning this, so you gotta movefast
Seems to me that this process is the same any state, but dont quote me on that. You have to have a written letter of approval from your psychologist (the doctor from any gender clinic works fine) saying you have been diagnosed with gender dysphoria and are currently being treated by professional care for a medical transition. (Hormones alone work for this). For some reason you cannot really do anything drivers lisance related in TN without this kind of letter. Once you get the letter, print it out and take it to a DMV, they should in theory change your gender marker no questions asked on your drivers lisance.ALSO, IN TERMS OF COLLAGE ID/LIVINGThe same kind of note has worked for me and many other people I know to change your gender in a college database, which in turn can make it so that with medical notes you can transfer and properly live in the mens or women's dorms on campus. Take that letter and email housing departments at your college explaining your purpose, and then you should be able to get into a women's dorms at any college campus. Make sure your dorm with a friend tho. I didn't to the process until I had a confirmed bestie I knew wasnt transphobic.
LOVE YOU ALL YOU GORGEOUS PEOPLE.
Good luck to ya guys, gals, and non binary pals.
submitted by TyTransBiatch
to MtF [link] [comments]
2023.05.31 02:03 Ottorrongo Grace VanderWaal at "Anti Social Camp" - New York City - June 12-17